Question:  I know I need help to book more weddings, but I’m not sure your suggestions will work. They just don’t seem like ME.  What should I do?

smiling couple
I am really excited about all the info you share with us and I think it is great but I have the feeling we kind of need to have a different approach.  May it be in our website to start off with? May it be in our first email? I do not know.  I understand we need help…also I am a little scared that if there has to be a lot of changes we loose who we really are, cool, friendly, professionals, serious, passionate always striving to offer great customer service and last but not least Melissa (The artist) has done work within the most demanding atmosphere (Hollywood). Doing music videos, soap operas, awards ceremonies, fashion weeks, hair shows, photo shoots, movies, etc.  She travels back and forward to Los Angeles and updates her “fashion sense” every 8 weeks, which is huge.  She has such a close relation with industry leaders such as MAC and REDKEN that they give her products to try out before they commercialize them!  She is probably the only licensed professional in Cancun (in Mexico you do not need a license). Also she does both (hair and make-up) which nobody does!!!!! And she speaks fluent English which again nobody does!!!

I know this is huge and we should be getting a lot more brides than what we are and it is frustrating to see people that do not have the qualifications are getting way more business than us.  I also understand that we only started with the business here in Cancun in October and it needs some time but if the requests are flying in why on earth are we not closing them.

Anyways Steph as you can see I can go on and on as I am sure every other vendor can about how great they are, but in all honesty comparing to the industry vendors down here in Cancun we are by far the best!


I really appreciate your honesty.  Thank you.

Here’s the question: is what you are doing now getting the results you want?  If so, don’t change it!  Keep doing what works, no matter what anyone else says.

On the other hand, if it’s not working, then anything else you do has a much better chance of working than what you’re doing now.  If you keep doing the same thing, you are guaranteed to get the same results.

You’ll want to test, experiment and change until you get the results you want.  Make sure you’re tracking your leads, where they come from and whether or not you get a response.  Sometimes it takes some refining to get the right combination.

In our experience, it usually takes a month or so before you see a noticeable difference.  However, our clients get a response rate up to 50% higher.  Most of them need a little help customizing their response in a way that gets results.

Right now, the brides who are contacting you either…

a) Don’t care about Melissa’s amazing experience with Hollywood hair and makeup OR

b) Aren’t understanding the VALUE this brings to hiring you because you haven’t communicated it to      them.

You need to change the way you market and sell to these brides, start targeting a new market of brides who are the right match for you, or possibly both.  And that means big, fat, scary CHANGE.

I want to address your concern that if you make a lot of changes you will, “lose who you really are.”

It’s a common fear.  When you make a change to a different way of doing things, it feels very “not you.”  In fact, “not you” is exactly what you need!

“Being you” and doing what comes naturally for you is NOT getting you the results you want.  You’ll have to change and do something that is NOT you…at least not yet…if you want to change your results.

Let me explain with an example from my life…

When we first started our DJ business, we didn’t know who would do the announcing.  Would it be Jeff (the singer-songwriter guitarist) or me (the “quiet girl”)?

I never, ever would have predicted that I would be the mistress of ceremonies at a wedding, speaking before hundreds of people every weekend.  I was the kind of girl who hated parties because large groups of people freaked me out.

I wish I could say that the first time I picked up the microphone I knew I’d found my calling.  The truth is that it felt completely unnatural!  I was extremely nervous, and had a habit of tripping over my words during my first sentence at every single wedding.

But I kept at it, and eventually I found myself in this behavior that was “not me.”  I became the confident public speaker I envisioned for myself.  I stopped bumbling my words and quit shaking when I picked up the mic.

I grew into that new behavior that I desired, but if I hadn’t pushed through that uncomfortable “not me” period, I never would have gotten there.

Of course, you should not engage in any business practices that you believe are unethical or dishonest and in that sense are “not you.”  Even when it comes to making a change that will get you better results, make you more money, attract the clients you want and make your life easier, expect that those, “This isn’t ME!” objections will come up.

If these changes are unnatural for who you are today, but they would be quite natural for the person you want to become, then making those changes will take you in the right direction.

Make the change anyway.  Measure your results for a set period of time, like a month.  And remember: change is not a one way street.  If it doesn’t give you the results you want you can always change back.

My motto: feel the fear and do it anyway.

What do you think about making changes that are “not you?”

Got a wedding business question you want answered? Email Stephanie & Jeff and you could be the next Question of the Week! All personal details about your identity will be removed unless you specify otherwise.

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Stephanie Padovani

Stephanie is a Hudson Valley wedding insider, blogger, writer, and wedding business coach. Want to book more weddings at higher prices? Quit dealing with price shoppers? Transform your wedding business so that it supports the life you really want? Look her up! They don't call her the Wedding Business Cheerleader for nothing. :)

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0 thoughts on “What to Do When You’re the Best…But the Brides Aren’t Booking You”

  1. Anonymous says:

    This article is amazing and made me start to take a closer look at my business, Luna Earth Event Décor, which I’m starting to re-design the website for it’s one-year anniversary.

    I understand where you had come from by being the shy one because I’m use to being behind the scene by decoration the location, but realized that if people don’t know me than they won’t book me, so I would have to push my way through by being in front of the media as a PR for the business to book more brides.

    Now I’m thinking about taking class in public speaking to reduce my fear to speak in front of people.

    Thanks again,

    Leeta Song

  2. Anonymous says:

    I know what you mean by being scared getting on the microphone. I got my start in the Disc Jockey world by working in clubs – a VERY different type of skills from those taking care of a couple on their wedding day.

    When one day, I was asked to ‘fill in’ for a WEDDING DJ!! I thought, sure, I can do that! But then when the day came, I was soooo nervous – my stomach was queasy, my hands sweaty – that I wasn’t sure I could do it!

    But after the introductions were done (and without mispronouncing anyones names!) I started to relax and have fun, just like the crowd was!

    It was then that I knew I was hooked! Clubs were fun, but weddings were great!!

    For years I still got that nervous feeling, but it always disappeared after the grand entrance.

    Sometimes it best to just push through things to gain not only the experience, but the right attitude as well!

  3. Anonymous says:

    Hi Steph! I agree with you completely – I think everyone has to have a balance between what is THEM and what’s slightly uncomfortable. One of my mentors says that everything turns out better when you push just past the point that’s comfortable to you. For example I’m in the middle of rebranding, and my new logo is way more out there than I imagined I’d ever do, but it’s exactly what IS me while being a little past comfortable, and it’s awesome.
    Great advice!! 🙂

  4. Anonymous says:

    I like this very much as I am in the same boat. I know I offer a unique product to brides but no one is gravitating towards it. Personalised poetry can be many things to a bride from wedding vows to gifts for the guests.

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