mouth shut

It really ticks me off when wedding professionals say dumb things that hurt their businesses, limit their opportunities and attract negativity.  I know you don’t mean it, but that doesn’t make it any less damaging or any easier to bear.

Not just because it drives me crazy–even though it does–but because I really love our wedding pro friends and clients.  So take this as the tough love it’s meant to be.

Your words have the power to create your reality; choose them carefully.

Quit saying these dumb things that hurt you!

(This blog post was inspired by Marc MacIntosh’s brutally honest presentation at the Wedding MBA.)

1. “All brides care about is price.”

Wrong.  Price is NOT the only thing brides care about and it’s almost never the most important thing.

When couples were asked if price was the determining factor when hiring a wedding vendor, 80% said NO.  (The Wedding Report)

Of course, price is a factor, but only after the couple is convinced that you are going to deliver value for the given price.

More accurately, all they care about is VALUE.  And it’s your job to communicate that value to them.

Will you show up on time?  Will the guests have fun?  Will they be proud to show the wedding photos to their grandkids?  That’s the type of value they’re after.

When you blame your inability to adequately communicate your value on the bride’s so-called price fixation, it only makes price more of an issue.  You assume a defensive position against the, “How much?” question and attract more price resistance.

2. “I can’t afford to hire a professional.”

We go NUTS when brides and grooms dare to hire an amateur or choose DIY options over hiring a professional.  We have lists of reasons why it’s a horrible idea, and we’ll spend hours trying to convince them to hire a pro because, “In weddings there are no do overs.”

Yet you design your own website.  You write your own website copy, littered with typos and grammatical errors.  You hire a high school kid to set up your blog.

Take your own advice: hire a professional for your business and marketing needs.

If you want professional results from your marketing, invest in professional help.  Or suffer the same fate as couples who hire an amateur for something that’s vitally important to them.

3. “I don’t have time to market my wedding business.”

Marketing is the process of transforming that stranger into a paying customer.  Nothing happens in business until somebody buys something, and nobody buys anything without marketing.

The wedding pros with mediocre talent and kick ass marketing will outsell those with outstanding talent and poor marketing any day of the week.  Look around you; it happens every day, and you know it.

If you don’t make time to market, you won’t have a business for long.

You need to become a good marketer if you want to succeed in business, and yes, marketing is a skill that can be learned.  If you aren’t prepared to learn it or if you don’t have the cash to hire proven marketing help, your wedding business will whither and die.

4. “Working in the wedding business sucks.”

This dumb thing pros say comes in varying forms.  Everything from, “I hate weddings!” to, “Working weddings means I have no life.”

Hey, I’ve been in the wedding business for 13 years.  I know the sacrifices we make, giving up our weekends, our spare time and sometimes even our sanity to serve an incredibly emotional, demanding clientele.

But that’s a choice you made.  I’m pretty sure no one put a gun to your head and MADE you become a wedding pro.  Each wedding you work is an opportunity to make a difference to that couple and to earn a living so you can take care of your family.

Complain about the wedding business at your own risk; that negativity will be reflected in the clients you attract and the quality of your life.

Take a good hard look at your wedding business.  Is it where you want it to be?  Are you living the life you want?

You are responsible for the life you’re living, and only you have the power to change it.

I’m not exempt from saying these dumb ass things that hurt us.  I’ve blamed others to avoid accepting responsibility, too.

This rant is written to myself as much as it’s written to you and my wedding professional friends.  It’s a warning and a reminder to watch what we say because it creates the reality we experience.

What’s the dumbest thing you’ve heard a wedding pro say?

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Stephanie Padovani

Stephanie is a Hudson Valley wedding insider, blogger, writer, and wedding business coach. Want to book more weddings at higher prices? Quit dealing with price shoppers? Transform your wedding business so that it supports the life you really want? Look her up! They don't call her the Wedding Business Cheerleader for nothing. :)

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6 thoughts on “4 Dumb Things Wedding Professionals Say”

  1. The most successful wedding businesses are specialists. Martha Stewart serves the crafty, do-it-yourself wedding niche. David’s Bridal specializes in the budget wedding niche, offering cheap gown options, while Vera Wang serves the couture niche and offers dresses with astronomical price tags.

  2. Are there really wedding pros that say working in the wedding business sucks?? I am incredulous. I absolutely love it when I get the opportunity to go to a celebration to capture a brand new journey starting. Yes it is work, but think of what that day means to your client. I am almost as excited to be at the wedding as the Bride and Groom are. It’s the old attitude and altitude motto. One determines the other…..

    1. I see people say it a lot on FB….I just shake my head!

    2. Yes. I’ve seen it on FB, too, and I think about all the brides and grooms who might be reading it…

  3. Jamie says:

    A wedding photographer emailed me, “nor are we going to spend the hours that it would take to email [your wedding pictures]. Each email can only hold about 2 images at a time. It would just be a waste of time since you will be getting your images soon.” I would never tell my customer that something you should be doing for them is a waste of time.

    1. Yikes! I certainly wouldn’t want to “waste my time” working with that photographer.

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